Western Dining Etiquette and Table Mannerism

1) All that we teach for corporate Malaysia has to bear significance on the business needs of the organizations. Otherwise, it is just passing on knowledge to be stored and maybe hardly used. The spirit of training is for the learners to take home some practical tips that they can immediately put to use.

2) We received many requests for Western Dining Etiquette, as much as Business Etiquette and Protocol.

3) As most of us would probably know by now, there is a table setting for Western Fine Dining, how to cut and pick up different types of food and so on.

4) Let’s ask ourselves – how fast can our learners pick up the western dining culture unless it is practiced on a daily basis? I don’t think many of our upbringing, traditions and customs are western at all. If that is so, the burning question is, why do we need to learn western dining?

5) Let me offer a 2-prong answer - defining dining for the occasion and applying the dining experience appropriately.

6) First, whether it is Western, Japanese, Indian, Chinese or Russian, it has to be relevant for the current business need. For example, Overseas Posting Programs (OPP) have the dining elements in them depending on which countries the learners are going to be posted to. Or, if an organization has a large number of expatriates from a particular country, we need to cater for that group of high-level executives.


7) In other words, dining etiquette is not meant to be a set of rules to foreign customs and traditions, but rather a guide to demonstrate respect and tolerance of people from different background, culture or custom, whom we deal with on a daily basis.

8) The second prong of my answer is on the definition of fine dining, formal dining, semi-formal dining and casual, and who participate in each of the different categories.

9) For fine dining, we are looking at Carcosa Seri Negara as the setting and environment, usually prepared for important guests and key business associates. You can tell that it is fine dining by just looking at the silverware and silver-service.


10) Formal dining is one rung lower than fine dining; all 5-star hotels should offer that. So do grandiose Chinese or Japanese restaurants. The menu is somewhat a fusion and the silverware feels lighter (to save cost). Most of the times, the F & B staff do not lay out the full set of cutleries and crockery (again, to save cost). And don’t be surprised to find the silver-service falling short of expectation these days.

11) Semi-formal dining is like family dining. Some examples that come to mind are Tony Roma’s, TGIF, Italian restaurants, Overseas Restaurant, Saloma etc. This is good for family and friends, even clients.

12) Casual dining is our everyday staple consumption and patronage. You and I chill out at these places, away from work, bosses and clients, where we can “be our true selves”.

13) We have a 3rd and probably, the essential factor in dining. It is the behavior we portray at the dining table. Many of us would call that “table manners”.

14) How we are supposed to improve on our finesse by just knowing which cutlery to use if the multitude negative behavioral traits that we inadvertently showcase during a formal business luncheon cause distaste amongst our clients (who are polite enough not to tell us) and embarrassment to our organization’s management (who straight-forwardly send us for training).

15) Somehow the writing is on the wall for many, it is really the table mannerism, isn’t it?




Albert CH Lee
First Impressions Group

What has grooming got to do with it?

1) I must admit our company started with teaching professional image and grooming. Various companies have been engaging us for those topics since 2001.

2) One of the interesting things I observed during numerous HR development assignments was, most companies interpreted grooming as company dress code, make-up, hair-styling, skincare and personal hygiene – all lumped in one.

3) I found that, and continue noticing today, that many companies engaged cosmetic companies to teach make-up and skin-care to their staff, usually with the agreement that the cosmetic companies were allowed to promote their respective products in return for “free” training.

4) A more worrying trend is, more companies are having staff grooming issues and hence, more training that they need.

5) When my clients ask me about the difference between how my company and other cosmetic companies teach grooming, I tend to smile. I know I have a lot of explaining to do, to clear the air on long-standing misperception.

6) Firstly, it depends on what the clients want and why their workforce has grooming issues. I thought most employees know, needless to say, they have to be presentable at work. I remember back in the old days, employees were proud to work for companies, pride themselves in their jobs and presented themselves well for their employers. My grandfather was really slick, neat and tidy in his looks when he reported to work every morning.

7) Let me stress this from my observation – work values have eroded tremendously from the days of Generation X.

8) Who and where do we point our fingers to? How we bring up Generation Y plus the effects of the public and private education sectors maybe. The leadership of our country and Corporate Malaysia could also be responsible.

9) I fear we have a population crisis, especially of our working community. We may have missed our side of the bargain that we have to carry that professionalism (and yes, that also goes with grooming) when we ply our services and skills with our employers, in return for acceptable remuneration and reward.

10) This is an issue of values, not even mind-set, not knowledge, not skills, not whatsoever. How could we have missed the point, after arming ourselves with diplomas, degrees, doctors of philosophies and all the necessary successful career tools, that we still need to learn how to groom up for work?

11) When I ran through my clients’ training needs with them, I found another related matter on staff grooming – motivation.

12) I don’t know how to say this another way, the motivation factor is directly linked to company management and HR. Many people know and read Maslow. We just need to internalize it. However, it is easier said than done.

13) Back to grooming skills and training, what benefits do the companies and their staff get if they engage cosmetic companies to impart sophisticated make-up and skincare techniques to their staff?

14) I believe the HR department may want to look at the required skills gap and training objective, as well as understanding the objective of the cosmetic company when they agree to conduct “free” training. From what I know, their trainers have to follow training procedures to introduce their line of products during the workshop. Free cosmetics samples are given out to induce the buying impulse.

15) Our efforts would be futile if we end up having our staff buying cosmetics and skincare products that they don’t need instead of looking at motivation, value system, habitual traits and company culture as factors for improving work performance.

16) If our staff is having grooming issues, this could be an ominous signal of the way the business is being run and whether our human resource is properly deployed.



Albert CH Lee
First Impressions Group